Flowers? Finally fucking figured out.
Rings? Picked out and ready
Cake? Will be finished.
Food? All in order
Sweets? All ready.
And the list goes on and on to linens, venue, set up, shoes and jewelry, table settings, vows, speeches and, oh god there's so much more to a wedding than I could have ever imagined, we almost forgot favors for our guests and a special gift for our wedding party.
I bought pearl necklaces for all the girls, including Lina and Mia though Monica would be taking care of theirs until they were old enough to have them either when they were sixteen or eighteen, I went with pearls because mine was and because I thought they were more classy than a diamond necklace which all the girls already had from valentine's day or Christmas or an anniversary.
I'm not saying they're not great gifts but I wanted something different, that none of them already had.
Everything was taken care of and the girls and I were going away for the weekend before the wedding on Tuesday and we would spend two nights here and then a night at the hotel near the venue.
Rochelle, Monica, Trista, Lina, Mia, Linda and I were about to have a great weekend and Monica's parents agreed to take Miguel and Monica's mom had baby Michael. Monica was alright being away from the kids but Rochelle; well she was a first time mom and missed her baby.
We got a suite with three rooms, the twins would share, Linda would get her own room and us four girls were going to be sharing in the room away from the other two because we knew kids needed sleep and Linda loved her sleep almost as much as she loved her kids and husband.
First thing Rochelle and Monica wanted to do was go into the hot tub and sauna since they could now so we all got into swim suits and went to the pool though Linda opted out for a book and a nap insisting we went so she could enjoy the quiet.
Monica and Rochelle were a little skeptical though, Trista was a model and Monica was okay with her new body but Rochelle was uncomfortable with her breasts being larger and her stomach still loose and stretched from being pregnant.
"I don't know." Rochelle covered her stomach and she eyes Trista in her bikini.
"You look great; don't let stupid people and their stupid ideas on what you should look like get to you." Monica told her and Trista turned to look at her.
"You look awesome Rochelle and you're a mom and you have to accept that your body is never going to be the same and get used to your new one because you're too beautiful to be self-conscious and cover yourself up."
Rochelle groaned then turned to the mirror and poked her stomach.
"Hey, I got this and I'm not pregnant, I don't have an excuse." I pinched the fat in my stomach, it wasn't a huge amount but I wasn't going to starve myself to make it go away, I was comfortable in my skin. I had fat to my legs and I had a large chest and I was okay with that.
I think people just need to be happy with what they have and stop judging. Trista was so damn thin and she was willing to put in the hours at the gym to look that way where the three of us weren't. Monica was a small girl though and as soon as she lost this baby weight she would be tiny with huge boobs and she was happy with that.
Rochelle's hips are wider now and her breasts are larger and her stomach right now has more fat to it then she's used to but that's okay as long as she can be happy with it, no shame in being a new mom and new mom's don't need society's added pressure after making a baby and going through labor.
"Alright, let's go." She said and her spirits seemed a little higher now thankfully.
We took the girls down and they knew how to swim but Monica made a strict rule that they were to stay in the shallow end and even though she was engaging in conversation with us in the hot tub she watched them like a hawk out of the corner of her eye, it was kind of scary.
"So you ready?" Monica asked me and I nodded
"Both to be his wife and for this shit to be done, planning a wedding sucks." I groaned and Monica smiled and nodded
"It does but I'm jealous, I want another one." She sighed
"Thinking about a divorce?" Rochelle joked and Monica splashed her with water.
"Of course not but renewing our vows for our ten year wouldn't be a bad thing." Monica shrugged with a smile, saw that one coming and there was nothing wrong with it though it was weird to think that Lina and Mia were nearing ten and they were thinking about their ten year anniversary when Rochelle and I were just not getting married and starting a family.
"No it wouldn't." I agreed
"I don't know if Riley would go for it though." She said sadly
"Why not?" Trista asked
"Miguel and Maria were there and I don't think he wants to mess with those memories." She said and the familiar pain in my chest appeared when anyone mentioned my parents but I pushed it away.
"I'm getting married without them and we have to accept that they're not coming back and we can't stop living our lives because they were taken from us too soon." I told her "I'll talk to him about it once we get through all this stuff first." I think Monica deserves to have this.
They were young before and they deserve a wedding with real friends and after everything Riley's put her through these years, especially with his drinking problem, renewing their vows wouldn't be a bad idea, letting her know that he loves her and appreciates what she put up with. She's a fantastic wife and went through enough in the last ten years to break a marriage but theirs was still strong.
"Well right now it's Brylee's turn and we're going to focus on the bride." Trista said and I smiled at her.
"No she's right, I'll have my turn and Monica will get hers but right now this is all about you Brylee, after all you've done for us you deserve all the attention on you even more." Rochelle leaned her head on my shoulder and Monica did the same on my other side.
"We love you." they said in unison and I laughed at them before Trista splashed us all with water making us cough and shoot her a dirty look to which she smiled sweetly.
"Cause baby I'm a nightmare dressed like a daydream." She sang off key and we all couldn't help but laugh, why do her songs have to be so catchy?
"Lina." Monica yelled and then turned to face her and she stepped away from the deep end and went back to the shallow, scary.
After the pool we all showered and later that night when the kids were tucked in bed Monica and Rochelle asked to steal me away and Trista went to go spend time with Linda. I didn't like where this was headed.
"Yes?" I asked as soon as we got outside and they looked at each other and then at me.
"We just want to make sure that you're okay." Monica said and I frowned at them in confusion
"I'm at a spa with my best friends and I'm getting married in two days, I'm great." I told them and Rochelle sighed
"We haven't got to spend much time with you since the babies have been here and we feel awful for not asking sooner but are you okay with that, you know, since they're physically here now." She said and I clutched my jaw in irritation.
Why, why would they bring this up now?
"Chase and I are dealing with it." sure I felt a little sadden these past couple months just because I would have been due too but I was okay, Chase and I were okay. Things happen and in a few months hopefully we'll have that good news to share.
I didn't need it bring brought back up again.
"Are you though?" She asked me
"Why would you bring this up right now, what could you gain from it? It sucks but it happens and I'm tired of it bring brought up when I'm trying to move forward with my life and focus on my future, on the family Chase and I can have not the baby I lost." I stood up abruptly.
I was tired of talking about it, everything that can be said on this subject had been and now all that's left it time for it to hurt less. It was so much easier to handle now than when it happened last year and it will be easier next year.
People had miscarriages every day, people who knew about their babies beforehand, some people carried full term and for some reason they died right around their due date. Life has tragedy and if you simply focus on that then you're going to be miserable.
This was supposed to be a happy weekend.
I went to get some food and when I went back upstairs the girls were waiting for me.
"Yes?" I asked again
"We're sorry; it was bad timing on our part." Monica apologized.
"And we're sorry for bringing it up again, we know that you don't want to dwell on it, we were just concerned." I was irritated but I wasn't angry. I understood why they would ask but it was mine and Chase's business.
"It's fine." I said and I laid down on the bed, I didn't want to fight with them this weekend, I wanted to enjoy it.
"Hair and nails tomorrow?" Trista broke the awkward tension and I smiled, she was blunt and bold and good at that, I don't know if she's ever felt awkward a day in her life.
"Yeah, sounds good but fist I'm thinking sauna a facial and a massage." Those sounded fantastic and I would take advantage of them on our honeymoon as well, we were doing a two week Caribbean cruise and would be leaving the morning, two days after the wedding for a flight and then getting on the ship.
For those two weeks we were shutting off our phones and I told Riley I would check my e-mail every couple days and to only contact me if there's an emergency or I would kill him.
The girls and I pushed two beds together and we bonded, it's been absolutely amazing having Trista here, I missed her. She used to come stay the summers with Chase's parents and they would visit for breaks and had always liked her and I would need to make sure to keep I touch.
In the morning we had breakfast brought in and we ate together, Linda and I went to get a massage and she wasn't shy about doing it together and neither was I so we used it as some time to talk.
"This is wonderful, thank you." she sighed as they woman pressed on her back and I smiled. Another treat for them from me, spending so much money lately has been weird but nice and I enjoyed spending it on the people I loved.
I knew that the boys went out for a poker night last night and were going to a strip club tonight, I almost killed him but because he was taking my alcoholic brother to a fucking bar but they assured me someone would be with him at all times and they were drawing black x's on his hands too, which I'm sure Riley loved.
Did it bother me they were going to a club to watch mostly naked girls dance on a pole and probably them? Not really. I was thinking male strippers for Rochelle's bachelorette party. The girls were in agreement with me. Monica wouldn't be married still and Rochelle and I wouldn't be getting married if we didn't trust them.
In my opinion, it's harmless fun. I'm the one Chase is going to be marrying and I'm the one that's going to be underneath him and being pleasured as soon as we get to our room Tuesday night and I know I was the one he wanted to see in lingerie.
He didn't need tasteless and trashy; he loved me and my body just the way it was.
"You enjoying yourself?" I asked her and she nodded
"I am. It's nice not having to cook and clean and take care of Thomas and David and I don't have to worry about work." She groaned as they dug into a certain part of her back and I sighed as they pushed on my lower back and then again when she worked on my shoulders.
I booked two hours and we were all doing a group one tonight, none of us were uncomfortable with a little bit of skin showing, there were blankets over us so I personally didn't see the big deal with it.
"So how are you and Chasen doing?" she asked and I felt a little guilty, Chase and I didn't tell her about the miscarriage and after weddings were over we would and we promised to spend more time with them as well.
"We're great, honeymoon's all booked and I'm excited, it's going to be beautiful." The Caribbean was absolutely beautiful from what I hear but I've never been there before.
We've been to France, Italy, Europe and Australia as kids but I haven't been outside the country in a long time. Up until we started school we lived in Italy and then when we were eight we spent a school year in France which Rochelle's parents agreed to easily but Chase's parents needed a lot of convincing.
We were going no matter what, my mom wanted us to experience other cultures and I have found memories of it, I think it was the most Rochelle saw her parents, they would come visit her in France but they couldn't be bothered to actually raise her.
Though traveling parents did have an advantage for Rochelle, she speaks four languages fluently and can converse pretty well in a total of six. Riley and I grew up learning English of course and both my parents spoke fluent Spanish then with living in Italy as kids, my parents needed to know it and so when we got the hang of the first two they started a third.
The only reason I'm good with French is because Rochelle's mother was born in Paris and speaks it fluently and she taught us when we moved and she continued to teach me.
"I think David and I need a vacation."
"Well when you're okay with it, we can take Thomas for a little bit for you two to get away." I offered. He's going to be my little brother and he was quite shy which was understandable, he was in some shady foster situations and the poor kid got his hopes up for adoption twice only for them to back out before Linda and David adopted him.
I think Chase should spend more time with him and I would like to get to know him better as well. I think he may eventually get along with Lina and Mia, he's not too much older than them and the twins are kids his age that I know are sweet hearted children.
"Really?" she asked
"Of course, he's family." I looked over at her and she reached her hand out for mine.
"I'm glad that it's you he's marrying, I for one called that when you were five." She said and I laughed.
"Five?" I asked
"Yep, I've known you were going to be my daughter for seventeen years and it took Chasen long enough to figure it out as well."
"He said he's known since we were fifteen." I said lightly because I still wasn't sure about that one.
"Sounds about right, I used to read his diary until he became sexually active." She cringed a little and I could only imagine.
"He had a diary?" I asked her amused and she nodded
"Yes he did." I liked learning new things about Chase, I knew so much about him and I can't see the awkward naked baby pictures because I already have, my parents took a lot of the embarrassing pictures you would show their girlfriends and we were around each other for all the painfully awkward detail of life.
Chase knew at what age I started wearing 'big girl panties' he's seen the naked baby pictures, he was there for the horrible haircuts and bad clothing choices, he was at the house when my mother not so subtly talked to me when I got my period for the first time and blurted out at fifteen that she was now okay with my having a thong like I asked for. He was there for all the awkward developing of a tomboy into a girl so there's really nothing that could make me embarrassed when it comes to him.
Well except for those teenage years, learning about sex and there was that time he didn't know about where I may have been thinking about him when I was alone in my room, I was sixteen and it surprised me that I even thought about it and I thought he saw me as a friend or worse a sister and buried those desires and feelings so deep, obviously the feelings were deeper than the desires though.
We caught up a lot more and after that we all went to get our nails done and toes, the kids got theirs painted and I had long nails so I had mine painted too, I almost got acrylic but Chase and I would be on the cruise and I wouldn't be able to maintain them, plus I got satisfaction out of my nails digging into his back and that's something you can't do as well with fake nails.
We had lunch, got our hair cut and then relaxed before we went in for the group massage.
By the time we crashed that night we all were feeling pretty great.