It's been an exhausting few weeks between work and spending time with Rochelle and Scott then Riley and Monica with also spending the time with Chase's mother, I've been feeling so guilty about leaving her out that I'm doing absolutely everything I can to include her now. She says she understands and she's such a sweet lady that she truly does.
It took me a little while to see just how selfish I was being, this isn't just my wedding, it's her son's too and I know she doesn't have a daughter and I should have taken this time to bond more with her rather than pushing her away, I don't care if she understands, I feel awful about it.
I wish I could sleep through the weekends but I took time to go shopping with her to find a nice dress for an early spring wedding, it wouldn't be freezing but it wasn't exactly the warmest weather while we were outside but then again, it's a warm space inside.
Even though we've been stretched thin and exhausted at best most days, Chase and I weren't letting our relationship go downhill like last time and we ordered lunch in the office and we worked in his most days together to get it all done.
Thankfully Riley would be back in the office in another week because I needed to cut back my hours here to get everything for the wedding finished, we've been working twice as hard with him gone and it's not like I wouldn't be there, I would just work six hour days instead of the ten we usually put in. And since he's taken two months instead of one off, I think that he can just suck it up for three and a half weeks. Maybe it's time to bring someone else in, but every time we talk about it we just can't, this was mom and dad's other baby and It's hard to trust someone enough.
But with Riley having a new baby and them wanting at least one more and Chase and I planning on starting a family we can't keep doing this, we work seven to five most days, if not later. Chase and I have been working six to ten the last three weeks, sometimes we even fell asleep here and let me tell you something, sixteen hour days weren't fun.
To keep things from going downhill Chase and I would take about an hour after everyone had left for ourselves, we would sit and talk or just curl up on the couch we had ordered for here after the first three days with Riley gone.
Anything to just spend a little time together so we didn't feel so disconnected from each other. Chase and I had decided to stop having sex after the new year until we were married, it fucking sucked when sex could be something to take so much stress away and Valentine's day, well we spent it here so it wasn't a big deal but it would have been nice to have some intimate time but it would make our honeymoon that much better so we were sucking it up.
When Riley got back to work I spent a few days catching him up on everything and then after the weekend I would be reducing hours here. With us being so busy we had booked the catering but we haven't actually picked out the food so I was stealing Chase for a couple hours during lunch and we needed to get that done, we were, at this point, three weeks out and that was cutting it too close.
We had went to the restaurant and they prepared the course for us and I was so stressed I had a hard time even enjoying the fantastic food.
They brought food for the appetizers table we would have during a cocktail hour while we do our pictures and I found nothing I didn't like from the mini bacon tarts to the dip, the stuffed tomatoes to the shrimp and we decided to do a larger variety since we couldn't choose.
Next they brought out the food for the main course, we wanted a formal sit down dinner but with this being so last minute we needed to give more flexibility with a buffet, we weren't able to give anyone the menu to ask them to pick one so we just asked which protein they wanted and would have to go from there.
We would have meat being cooked to order and they could pick what they wanted, the idea was a little all over the place but I was hoping it would make the guest the happiest and be less stressful that way so we weren't having to worry about remaking anything that they didn't like, weddings were so difficult.
There were sides from pasta to fruit, eggplant and veggies, we had burgers and macaroni and cheese for some of the kids. There should be enough variety that anyone should be able to eat.
When it got to dessert we opted on a small formal dessert with a variety of small tarts so we could do the speeches during that time.
And then the food was finished and we were very full as I dropped Chase off at work again and I went to go solve the flower disaster, well I attempted to. I went in there, saw the arrangements and called Chase's mom to just help me because I couldn't do it alone.
"What's wrong baby?" she came over to where I was sitting outside.
"Everything, they ordered absolutely everything wrong. The color, the flowers, the arrangements are horrible just everything." I was close to tears and if we couldn't fix this now, it was going to cost a fortune to reorder somewhere else and a lot more stress.
I sat back and his mother dealt with the problem a lot calmer than I would, I was about to scream and yell and turn into a horrible bridezilla but his mother was calmer when she demanded they be fixed since it was their mistake and they better be done on time.
"Come on honey." She wrapped her arm around me and we walked downtown.
"Where are we going?" I asked
"Coffee." She told me.
"I have to still go to-"
"Not right now you don't, you need to take a break." She kept pulling me down the road another couple blocks to a little coffee shop, she ordered coffee and I insisted on buying since she just dropped everything to come help me.
"Thank you." I told her as we sat down
"Anytime, now tell me what you have left to do." she said and I groaned
"fittings, jewelry, I have to get Chase's ring picked out today to have it on time, the girls need to have a fitting for their flow girl dresses, I need Thomas's suit to be done, we need to find you something to wear, the flowers are a constant stress, we need to finalize the layout of the venue and the linens, the music, all the little things we wanted there like the wishing tree and the frame for everyone to write on, decorations and I still am the maid of honor for Rochelle and have to help her with all that, Michael's only a few weeks old and-"
"Alright." She cut me off
"It's a lot, Chase and I haven't been able to do anything the past couple months." This wedding was horribly timed with these babies. I've barley even seen Rochelle, though it was incredibly sweet for her to give her son Riley's middle name.
"Let me help you honey, next weekend we'll get all the clothes settled and the flowers will be done. If you need me to pick anything up for you I will, Thomas has his suit so don't worry about him." Thomas was Chase's nine year old adoptive brother; his parents finalized the papers a few months ago.
"I just need everything done." I put my head in my hands.
"It will be and one wedding at a time, If Rochelle needs more help have her call me."
"Rochelle has more done than I do, thank Scott for that one." Lucky that she had someone to keep her on track with this thing.
"Well then don't worry about it and enjoy this time." I smiled because she was right and sometimes I forgot to do that.
"I can't wait to marry him." she smiled at me too
"Neither can he." She put her hand on mine and I sighed, she had that calming effect my mother always had on me and I was glad she was here.
"I'm sorry for not having you there when I picked out my dress." She patted my hand
"Don't worry about it baby, I'll see it next weekend." And I didn't know what to say, I felt like I didn't deserve her kindness right now and this whole thing would have been so much easier if I had let her help me from the start.
Next weekend I had no choice but to have the girls fitted for their dresses and they would either take it in a little extra or just hope they didn't drop a noticeable amount of baby weight in those two weeks.
Trista was working in New York which was fantastic so she could go with us for shoes and everything else and make sure it fit and would be able to be at the fitting, Chases mom was coming with us this time and she would get to see my dress as well, it was my third fitting and I was hoping everything would be fixed from last time because if not I was going to have a meltdown.
I did the last time, I went by myself and everything was just wrong with the dress and it fit horribly, I was two weeks out at this point and I needed it to be right or at least ninety five percent right; just no major issues.
I was antsy in the car on the way into the city and when we got there Trista was waiting and she gave Linda a huge hug, I don't know the last time those two saw each other. We went down stairs and they were pretty much connected at the hip as Linda sat outside and we all went to a room to put on our dresses.
I closed my eyes as they put the dress on me and laced it up; I was terrified at what I would be looking at but at least It didn't feel too tight. I opened my eyes slowly and sighed in relief, this was pretty much the first good thing that's happened in weeks.
I opened the curtain and Linda looked over from Trista who was already out to me and she smiled and her eyes watered as she stood up.
"You look beautiful honey." She put her hands on my arms and looked the dress over and then pulled me in for a hug
"Thank you." I couldn't help but cry, this is what I wanted from my mom but having this moment with Chase's mom meant almost as much to me, she was going to be my mother-in-law technically but she would always be more than that.
"He's going to swallow his tongue when he sees you." she said and I laughed, she pulled away and wiped the tears from my face
"Don't cry, your mother would think you were the most beautiful thing in this and every day, I know they're proud of you and they would have loved that you were marrying such a great guy, though I am biased as a mom." She smiled and I laughed again and nodded.
"They would, they loved him." I wiped at my face again and she smiled sadly at me.
"It's all going to be okay." She kissed my forehead and I haven't felt this in a while, that kind of love your parents make you feel but I liked it and I hugged her again as she ran her fingers through my hair, there were a bunch of other people around but this was our moment right now.
"Thank you for being here." She made it so much better.
"Anytime and when you need me to babysit my grandbabies you can call then too, I'm definitely looking forward to those" She said and I blushed, I know that we were planning on kids soon but his mom bringing them up was a tad awkward.
"Well then you'll be happy to know that we do intend on starting a family soon." I told her and she smirked.
"Guess it will be a good honeymoon then." She said and I couldn't believe she said that! I turned a brighter shade of red and the girls laughed
"Aunt Linda leave her alone." Trista wrapped an arm around me and Linda just shrugged.
"We're all adults here." True, but she was my fiancé's mother, not just any adult, though she was always pretty cool and laid back when she wasn't working.
"So girls, how do they fit?" I turned to Monica and Rochelle who were still laughing "Oh don't even, you two have kids which means we know what you guys were doing." I crossed my arms and they shrugged
"I'm married, I don't care." Monica said
"And I just don't care." Rochelle said, of course they didn't. out of the tress of us they were always the most open with sex and such and I was the shy one, though it appears they had better luck with guys.
Much to my horror, Monica was drunk one night and went on and on about how incredible my brother was in bed, at sixteen, so objectively I can only assume it went up from there but it didn't stop me from gagging and cringing and wanting to hit myself in the head with a hammer or something in hopes that I could have unheard everything she said, this was right before she found out she was pregnant.
Rochelle was no stranger to detail sharing but it was a lot more bearable since the guys she was with weren't related to me but me, well I had a couple shitty guys who made for years of low expectations and bad experiences and have only come to figure out since I've been with Chase that sex is a actually fantastic and enjoyable thing.
If Chase and I could be into what we're into I don't want to know what they could be into.
I got out of my head and back to the fitting, their dresses fit okay, they were a little big which was better than too small and the lady said they would be easy to take in, that it wouldn't be too much work really and Trista's fit perfectly after only one fitting.
After everything was pinned for alterations we made an appointment to come back next weekend, which was cutting it way too close for my liking and we went shopping, my treat to the girls. I just wanted them to feel pretty after they spent months feeling unattractive and it would be nice to have a shopping day to bond a little.
First we went to the store to look for a dress for Linda, I wish I would have gotten on this sooner so she could have picked something out and we could have ordered it but it just was too late even with offering to pay a rush fee so we went to a couple smaller dress shops and if it needed small alterations it wouldn't be a problem.
She really wasn't picky so she had no problem going in, looking and finding this deep green dress that she loved and I already knew it would look fantastic on her, she was a beautiful woman and she wasn't petite or large, she just looked great, especially for being nearly fifty, she looked closer to forty really.
It took one dress and she already was sold on it, they had it in a good size for her, it was a tad big but they said no problem to get it fixed for next weekend and then it was the fun part, accessory shopping.
Which is why we were now headed to the mall my dress was made for five inch heels and that was what I needed to find, I know it's a bad idea to get your dress fitted before having them but yet again it comes down to time.
I was going with white with some color to them and as we were to look at custom shoes I couldn't believe how much money we've spent on this wedding, I didn't know weddings could cost this much. Granted I wasn't concerned about money but it was still insane.
When I had brought it up to Riley he told me that his was just as bad and not to feel guilty about it but I did a little, it helped we were trying to keep with smaller businesses since you're money made a bigger difference to them than larger places but it was just a lot to swallow for things that were just going to be used one day, one day that was coming really quickly
I can't believe we were only two weeks out, in two weeks I was going to be a wife, Chase's wife. These past few months have gone by ridiculously fast but I wasn't getting cold feet and I wasn't scared about making a mistake, I believed with everything I had that he was the man I was supposed to spend my life with.